While flirtatiousness can take on many forms and titles, in essence it's stealing a gift that God hasn't given you.
For all intents and purposes, flirtatiousness is to lead on by your actions and words what you can not righteously fulfill. Quite bluntly, it is possible to play the dating game under the name of "saving your heart", and while never in a relationship with any of those individuals you are still giving your heart to them and taking from them what was never meant to be yours. I'm not going to go any further in defining it because I feel like God writes His commandments on our hearts and it's not necessary for me to make a list of rules.
But what can we do to destroy the spirit of flirtatiousness? While this is gravely incomplete, I have to ideas.
- As a young lady it is my desire to build up my brothers in Christ. This is the exact opposite of flirtatiousness and sows the seeds of Christ's love in the lives of others. Think about it, you were placed in this young man's life for a purpose... you have the power to build him up or destroy him... will you choose to selfishly seek your own desires? I'm guessing that this can work the other way around for any guys that may come across this.
- Don't set a standard of preference that your spouse can't live up to. Although this is a perhaps unproven theory, when you show preference (outside of seeking to know God's will but rather for selfish desires) I feel that that sets a standard of your preference which your spouse may never be able to live up to. How this plays out is, he liked her and I can never be as ________ (fill in the blank: skinny as, pretty as, witty as, smart as) her. This does not mean that you can never like anybody till you court and marry but rather that we should not selfishly show preference just because it feels good at the moment.
One of my favorite movie quotes was, "Then cherish her and become the man that she deserves." None of us are perfect, I know that I definitely am not... but we can still begin to cherish our spouse (whether we have an inkling of who that may be or not) and start becoming the person that they deserve.